Council tenants complaints (V Funny ;-)

Miles_TMiles_T Posts: 2,519
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Just found this on usenet....been giggling like a twat over these... hope you enjoy ...

Apparently these are genuine clips from British Council flat tenants complaining to the Council about problems with their flats.

* My bush is really overgrown round the front and my back passage has fungus
growing in it.

* He's got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I just can't
take it anymore.

* It's the dogs mess that I find hard to swallow.

* I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my
knob off.

* I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle very badly when he put
his foot in the hole in his back passage.

* And their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my
fence.

* I wish to report that tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof. I
think it was bad wind the other night that blew them off.

* My lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?* I am writing on behalf of
my sink, which is coming away from the wall.

* Will you please send someone to mend the garden path. My wife tripped and
fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant.

* I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen* 50% of the walls
are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster and 50% are plain filthy.

* I am still having problems with smoke in my new drawers.

* The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared.

* Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny colour and
not fit to drink.

* Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is now in three pieces.

* I want to complain about the farmer across the road; every morning at 6am
his cock wakes me up and its now getting too much for me.

* The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is
unsightly and dangerous.

* Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a third so
please send someone round to do something about it.

* I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would you please do
something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night.

* Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job and satisfy my
wife.

* I have had the clerk of works down on the floor six times but I still have
no satisfaction.

* This is to let you know that our lavatory seat is broke and we can't get
BBC2.




:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

Comments

  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 152
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    Wow:rolleyes:
  • TheCableGuyTheCableGuy Posts: 5,602
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    Very good. Any more?
  • fruitbatfruitbat Posts: 4,309
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    LMAO, thanks:D

    FB
  • SystemSystem Posts: 2,096,970
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    I only just caught this before it went off the page - some of those are absolute classics, really funny, thanks for posting :D
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 382
    Forum Member
    They all made me have a good laugh, excellant. :D;)
  • CloneClownCloneClown Posts: 6,296
    Forum Member
    A great post for a Friday night. Enjoyed laughing at some of them :)
  • dslrocksdslrocks Posts: 7,207
    Forum Member
    They're great! :D

    I got wind of this before seeing it here when I saw someone's emails that they had printed out being left on the back shelf of their car.
  • Raring_to_goRaring_to_go Posts: 20,565
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    I'm sorry .....but.....at the risk of being considered as a boring old fart I refuse to indulge in hilarity that is at the expense of peeps who I consider to be among the unfortunate members of our society....

    I would prefer it if this Government of ours took suitable measures to remove them from their plight.....that's it folks...don't mind me....have your little giggle...:p
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,575
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    Thanks for making my day They are brilliant
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 14,601
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    Originally posted by Raring_to_go
    I'm sorry .....but.....at the risk of being considered as a boring old fart I refuse to indulge in hilarity that is at the expense of peeps who I consider to be among the unfortunate members of our society....
    I wouldn't mind people laughing at what I may have done, but that's me aint it. :cool:

    But these are great, especially the toilet/wash kids, and the last one. :D

    *damo.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 45
    Forum Member
    very funny miles and howz your cat monkey doin these days?
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